Keeping it real

Yesterday's post reminded me of another pride-related confession I need to make. In years past, I used to prepare for our summer furloughs in the states by putting the kids through vigorous "training exercises" under the guise of wanting them to be better house guests. After all, we wouldn't want unruly children destroying the houses where we would be staying. Seriously! On a deeper level, though, God only knows my true motives were nothing short of pride. I didn't want to risk anyone seeing what we were really like. Instead I taught my children to become little hypocrites, acting the part of loving, well-mannered Christians, when their hearts were not quite there yet.

It wasn't until after I read the book Shepherding a Child's Heart (which I HIGHLY recommend, by the way), that I became convicted about only working on the outer appearances rather than focusing on heart issues. From then on I vowed to discipline my children to train their hearts to fear God, not merely to make Mom look good in front of her friends. I'll never forget the time we went up with Mike and his big ol' afro, and Tim and his long stringy hair. (I'll post a photo later.) It was still a struggle to not consider "What will people think?" but I forced myself to look at it from God's standpoint. No sin was being committed. Their hearts were good. Why should I require a haircut just to please our conservative support base?

Ironically it wasn't until I stopped being so paranoid about our "real selves" being revealed in the presence of our supporters that people began to really connect with me on a deeper level. I once had a woman tell me that she used to berate her children after we passed through as house guests, saying things like, "Why can't you be more like the Loker kids? They never...." Oh, my, what damage was done due to my pretense of having well-behaved children. This same woman was quite relieved on a later trip we made to the states, when she saw my kids acting like the kids they really were, and even not acting very "Christian" (read between the lines: they were fighting!). Then she began to talk to me on a deeper level. No pretense. No shame. Just honesty. Then and only then we became truly sisters.

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Ah, the joy of transparency. On this note, I want you to pray about an upcoming venture of mine. I've been asked to start a weekly blog for "Women of the Harvest" (the group that sponsored the retreat I attended in Colorado this past July). The editor wants it to have a light-hearted tone like many of my blog posts here, encouraging the missionary community of women to "Get Real" with each other, to laugh and cry together, and enjoy the fellowship of like-minded sisters. I am really excited about this opportunity to put my writing to good purpose. Lord willing, we'll start in January 2010.

We're trying to come up with a catchy title for this blog. Any suggestions? I'm open for ideas.