We're Okay; You're Okay (and not as rude as you appear)

Beyond the A-Z list, I keep finding more examples of things we instinctively do that are weird and different.

As I am thrift store treasure hunting, I fight a compulsion to always buy something on every visit.  Walking out without paying for anything, I'm afraid they might suspect me of shoplifting.  In Mexico, I taught the kids to never put their hands in their pockets after one of them was accused of stealing something.  Now I apologize and make some excuse whenever I leave a store with empty hands raised high and visible.

On the same note, I have great difficulty leaving any establishment without some sort of official leave-taking.  In Mexico you must greet all the strangers in the doctor's or dentist office when you arrive and again when you leave.  It just seems rude to not even make eye contact with random Michigan patients in the very same waiting room.  Rather than fight the urge, I'm just going to introduce this new custom to Dutch culture.  "Hello, world!" and  "Have a nice day, y'all!"

When we were leaving Taco Bell one day, my 16-year-old Debbie politely said thank you (again) to the people who work there, and we both stifled the urge to say, "Provecho!" to strangers at other tables on the way out.  We are just bound to feel rude no matter where we go. 

Bekah, my 19-year-old Freshman at Hope College, provides daily examples of cross-cultural collisions.  Last week she thanked one of her professors as she was leaving the classroom, and was told that she should take an America 101 class, because American students do not generally thank their teachers for administering exams.

But then on the other hand, people might think we are rude for even thinking of throwing out apple cores and banana peels from the car windows.  Is that still considered littering even though they are biodegradable?  They probably also think we are rude for not making eye contact with people in the farmer's market who are selling things we have no intention of buying.  That was sort of the unspoken rule in our local market in Mexico.  Otherwise you get harangued into buying something you don't want or need "for a really good price!"

Hopefully people will forgive any of our social bloopers.  Don't presume we are rude for not asking how you slept last night, and we won't presume you are rude for not caring how we "dawned" this morning.  But seriously, does it matter how you slept if you woke up grumpy?

Personally I think food tastes better when people are constantly wishing me good digestion, and the morning seems cheerier when someone asks how I woke up.  But as we tell our visiting teams, "It's not bad; it's just different." 

We're okay, and you're okay. That's my conclusion, and I'm sticking to it.